Posts Tagged ‘gemma atkinson


Island of Dr. Moreau is Less Fun to Watch in Real Life


Full-time socialite / plastic surgery buff(oon) Jocelyn Wildenstein was photographed eating lunch.

I’d really like to make some joke here about lion-women, or zoos, or something like that, but it’s hard to focus on being funny considering that my penis just crawled inside my body and started weeping uncontrollably.

Now, I’m a really serious journalist, but even I have no interest in exploring how this guy is able keep food down while pulling stunts like THIS one… or THIS other one. Maybe it has something to do with millions of dollars? Or fame? Or a twisted love of Narnia?

Hurt me, Aslan… I’ve been a very bad Ice Queen. Rake my back with your lion paws. Hurt me. OOOO…

Hey, my penis is back! Whew, thanks GEMMA ATKINSON!


Gemma Atkinson is Some Nice, Tasty Filler


I generally run a tight news machine here, but I felt the need to share a human interest story with you.

Gemma Atkinson is holding some huge bowling balls.

You might not be able to tell from this photograph, but, well… let’s just say that those bowling balls are pretty good substitutes for two other giant round things…

Now, I run an family friendly enterprise here, so that’s as bad as I’m going to get. No naughty Gemma pictures like THIS one, or THIS other one, or THIS other one…

Mmm, now that’s some good filler.